Does Anybody Else Look Like Me?: A Parent's Guide To Raising Multiracial Children

This is a good, fairly basic book on children dealing with issues of racial difference. Topics such as how and when children start understanding racial differences, how peers begin to react to racial differences in school and some basic strategies for parents are covered well. My one criticism is that the book is marketted for adoptive parents and yet its main focus is on the children of interracial couples. The author says - off-hand - at one point that the differences between these two situations are minor and beyond the scope of the book. That was a bit of a shock. I think the differences are probably vast. Parents of transracially adopted children don't have the basic resource of an adult partner from the child's background. That's an enormous enough of a difference that I really think the issues should be treated in separate books. My other reason for personal dissatisfaction is not the fault of the author. I am in the situation of adopting a minority child in a country where racism is still very overt and raw. I found the book's focus on Asian-Caucasian mixes unhelpful because, although there is some racism in American society, it is not nearly so intense, particularly when it comes to people of Asian background. If you are looking for a hard-ball book on dealing with intense racism, this probably isn't it. This is about dealing with run-of-the-mill basically well-intentioned ignorance, not open hostility.-A.F.

Being a multiracial woman myself (and mother to a multiracial child), I was very excited about this book. As the author adeptly points out, there's really very little out there - practically nothing - speaking to the task of raising multiracial children. It is important and significant that Nakazawa tackled this subject and gave it presence. She clearly did her research and has included an incredible amount of good information.However.By the time I finished reading this book, I had a weird, uncomfortable feeling. Something seemed off. If a monoracial parent asked me to recommend a book on multiraciality - I'm sorry to say I wouldn't recommend this one. The actual, authentic voices of multiracial peoples are not well represented here. An instruction manual written by a White woman on how to raise children of color is ultimately very treacherous. For instance, Nakazawa offers specific race wording and phrasing for interacting with children, often citing herself as a role model/example. Putting words in someone's mouth feels like robbing them of their own unique voice. It denies them the opportunity to discover their own language and potentially invalidates their specific cultures/worldview. And I have to say, as a woman of color, I reacted poorly to being given race scripts by a member of the dominant racial class.Unfortunately there is also some misinformation about early learning and race. "Race," Nakazawa claims, "Is really a grown-up notion that is meaningless to the vast majority of preschoolers" (12). In fact, this is not true. There is more and more research indicating young children are actually very aware of race and often masters of racial relationships by as young as 3 years (See "The First R: How Children Learn Race and Racism" by Debra Van Ausdale & Joe R. Feagin, also "Anti-Bias Education for Young Children and Ourselves" by Louise Derman-Sparks & Julie Olsen Edwards).And finally, I don't think Nakazawa addresses in a poignant way the reality of race and the necessity of parents addressing their own biases/stereotypes. How can we expect our children to converse intelligently on race and feel good about their racial identities if we cannot do so ourselves? For example, she is very optimistic about the future suggesting multiracial children are the end of race. This is a view that has come into great question these days as symptomatic of a "Postracial Era" apathy. Now that we have a Black multiracial president, we must not be racist anymore, right? She doesn't mention the troublesome trend of school resegregation that has unfolded in the last couple decades (see "Can We Talk about Race?" by Beverly Daniel Tatum, PhD). Also, she tiptoes around the need for White parents to address and acknowledge the painful truth of White privilege. Possibly because this would bring into deep question her authority in writing a book on the experience of multiracial people.If this book had been entitled, "Does Anybody Else Look Like Me? A White Parent's Guide to Raising Multiracial Children", I would have been a lot happier with it. I still would have bought it (I have a White mother) AND I would have recommended it. I certainly think Nakazawa has offered us something here. But I am critical of her perspective. As it stands, I would highly suggest to parents of multiracial children seeking guidance to look for texts written by multiracial people themselves. Here are some great examples:"Multiracial Child Resource Book: Living Complex Identities" (MAVIN) ed. Maria P. P. Root & Matt Kelley"Half Asian 100% Hapa" & "Mixed" by Kip Fulbeck"What Are You? Voices of Mixed Race Young People" ed. Pearl Fuyo Gaskins"Half + Half: Writers on Biracial and Bicultural" by Claudine C. O'Hearn"Mixed: An Anthology of Short Fiction on the Multiracial Experince" ed. Chandra Prassad"Standing on Both Feet: Voices of Older Mixed-Race Americans" by Cathy J. TashiroThere you will learn about the real, lived lives of multiracial peoples. Hearing their testimonials will inform you and help you understand your children better.For more please visit http://multiasianfamilies.blogspot.com/

Wonderful book for multi-cultural or transracial families. I love how the book was broken down and I also enjoyed that the book did not just focus on the Caucasian and African-American family dynamic. Clear and straightforward to read. I would like to see her do a follow-up book with more current studies and statistics, just to ensure that readers are receiving the most relevant information.

The good point is - it's the only book about this group of children on the market. So it has special value. It also deals with a rare group of biracial children, which is great as comparison if you have a child which is fairly unique in the country you live in.The bad points - it is written with such a small font, it is really very strenuous to read. Unfortunately it is not available as an ebook where you could adapt the font. The style also is not that great. You learn a lot about the personal life of the author and her family, but it does give you less direction on what to do with your own situation, at least in the beginning and by the time it maybe does, you are already put off, because of the font and the fairly boring writing style.For me personally it turned out after one look at the table of contents that it was useless, because it only starts when the child is a pre-schooler.So it does not deal at all with one's baby or toddlers search for like looking people, nor how to handle questions that the parent receives to their strange looking baby/toddler. Even more because they are stated blandly, people assuming that if the child cannot talk, it also cannot understand.If you have great eyes and children that are at least pre-schoolers or older, this may be a great read.

We have planned to adopt a sibling group since we were dating and some day we'll be able to. As a white couple, I want to make sure we're able to meet all our future children's needs. Racism is a real thing in this country and I'm not going to let our ignorance hurt our kids.

I like the way this book presents the information by developmental stages and ages. The personal stories from the people Nakazawa interviewed were wonderful and insightful. A good read for this grandma.

So little good information on raising biracial children. I love this book. It has good information but as always realize that every child is different just as is every family.

This book is good but goes very deep into the subject of muliracial children. I have not really found a lot of answer that I expected to get in this book.

This is the first book I have read that addresses the issue of raising multiracial children, recommended through a local group for non-Japanese mothers located here in Japan. Until I had seen the recommendation, looking for such a book had not even crossed my mind. Whilst Nakazawa's book is very much written from an American perspective and I am raising an Australian-Japanese child, (who is therefore likely to have a different experience again, whether she is living in Japan, Australia, or elsewhere) I still believe it to be relevant and found it a worthwhile read, opening my eyes to various issues that my child may face as she is growing up. If I were an American, I may have given it 5 stars. Many points raised had not occurred to me, supporting the view that many monoracial parents are often unaware of the problems their children are confronted by. The book progresses through the different stages of childhood from toddler to adolescent and includes suggested reading lists of books that depict multiracial children suitable for readers of different age groups. I found that list useful as a starting point to look for titles suitable to add to my daughter's library. Overall, I found it very educational, and I particularly liked the inclusion of various suggested approaches to hypothetical scenarios and the various anecdotes from the interviewees used for the book, highlighting the broad range of possibilities available for parents to pick up and use, discard, or build upon to develop their own style of child-raising. I am glad to have come across this book while my child is still barely 1 year old. As a result, I feel that I am a little bit more prepared for my role as a parent of a multiracial child, and believe this has broadened my outlook as to what is required of me to successfully raise a confident child.