How to Win Friends and Influence People

This book is timeless. Even though it was written a long time ago, the advice still applies perfectly today. It’s easy to read, practical, and full of simple ideas you can actually use in everyday life — at work, with friends, and in relationships. It really makes you think about how you communicate with people. I’ve gone back to it more than once and always get something new out of it. Definitely worth reading.

An outdated classic or a contemporary gem? Do we need an introduction here? “How to Win Friends and Influence People” is the all-time classic and best-selling book in the categories of self-help / personal development. Read and utilized by millions of people across the world. I remember being introduced to this book by my dad long time ago, when I was too young to appreciate the benefits of such a book. 15 years later, I found myself reading it ferociously. It’s no surprise why. An easy to read manuscript divided into small easily-digestible chunks with practical advice and examples to back each advice up. Dale Carnegie did not just decide one day to write a book about strategies of personal relationships. Before writing the book he taught thousands of people on such techniques and through his classes and seminars heard and analyzed myriads of stories of success and failure in human relationships. This book is the result of a lifetime of work and experience in human psychology and relationships. Still though, the question of whether the advice in this book is dated remains. My take is that, the advice and examples given are indeed a tiny bit dated. However the overarching theme of each chapter and the takeaway messages are as strong and relevant now as ever. Here’s what you should get out of this book. (1) TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE * Don’t criticize, condemn or complain. * Give honest and sincere appreciation. * Arouse in the other person an eager want. (2) WAYS TO MAKE PEOPLE LIKE YOU * Become genuinely interested in other people. * Smile. * Remember that a persons’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language. * Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. * Talk in terms of the other person’s interests. * Make the other person feel important—and do it sincerely. (3) HOW TO WIN PEOPLE TO YOUR WAY OF THINKING * The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it. * Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong”. * If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically. * Begin in a friendly way. * Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately. * Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers. * Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view. * Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires. * Appeal to the nobler motives. * Dramatize your ideas. * Throw down a challenge. (4) HOW TO CHANGE PEOPLE WITHOUT GIVING OFFENSE OR AROUSING RESENTMENT * Begin with praise and honest appreciation. * Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly. * Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person. * Ask questions instead of giving direct orders. * Let the other person save face. * Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise”. * Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to. * Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct. * Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie was written to serve as a guide to success. According to the author, this book is able to change the mindset of its readers, and it has the ability to completely reshape boring, dispirited lives into successful, exhilarating ones. The book explains key aspects of social and emotional interaction in order to lead readers into this unimaginable change in success. Throughout the book, Carnegie relates his own experiences as well as the experiences of his students, which display the positive effects of the actions that he teaches. The book is separated into several chapters that contain a set of principles on a specific subject. Some of these subjects include techniques in handling people, making people like you, and winning people to your way of thinking. Almost all of the content within this book are useful examples of situations that allow readers to connect to the information on an understandable level. The book is better referred to as a guide, written for people to take out and consult with in order to maintain or enhance a professional or social life. This book brought no regrets on my part. I am so relieved to have found a book that can actually teach people things extremely valuable to life. The numerous principles on how to successfully interact with people can be useful to anyone in almost every field. In the business field it can prove to be a miracle. Many jobs today require people to interact with others and work collaboratively. You may need to sell a doctor new medicines. You may need to create a PowerPoint with coworkers. No matter what it is, people must be able to deal with people successfully. In How to Win Friends and Influence People, Carnegie explains the simple secret he and everyone else should use to get people to do something, writing, “The only way I can get you to do anything is by giving you what you want” (Carnegie 95). This is what makes the book so great. Carnegie perfectly organizes these simple principles and rules that, if we all follow, will lead to a more successful, fulfilling, and accomplished life. I personally feel that I will need to refer to this book later in life because of its simplicity in putting together everyday social rules to illustrate a timeless lesson. If every single person in any single country were to read and fully indulge the main ideas of this book, then everyone in the world would want to do business with that country. The principles conveyed through Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People seem to be almost guaranteed to work, according to the examples and common sense. This is truly the only book that I have read that I feel will aid me in life. Because of this, I greatly recommend reading this book if you want to excel in a professional and social manner.

Read it!

Capolavoro!

Beyond doubt this book has been of considerable value and influence in my life. I've owned it in various editions and formats over the years and have consistently applied the principles countless times in numerous situations, and they’ve always proven to be effective, as they are as relevant today as they were when the book was first written. Basically, it’s timeless wisdom for getting the best out of social interactions and getting folk on side. As such, there’s a myriad of possibilities for use, and it works just as well for face-to-face interactions as it does for telephone conversations and online exchanges. It isn’t manipulative in the sense of trying to take an unfair advantage over one’s fellow man or woman, nor is it for lonely people who struggle to make friends (although they will likely benefit from reading the book). All it is is a set of courtesies and respect for others, with the planned outcome being that everyone benefits. Although it’s basically common sense, it’s common sense spelled out because as universal as these principles are, not everyone understands or utilises them. To me it’s a roadmap for a relatively smooth ride through life. Naturally, not everybody responds the same, and in some cases it will fall on deaf ears, but for the greater majority of time it will work wonderfully well. The book was originally written in 1937 but this is the revised edition. Nevertheless, the examples are still somewhat dated, with names and situations modern readers may not be familiar with, but the principles work and can be used with family, friends, co-workers, and the people who provide our daily products and services. In fact, they can’t not work because they’re based on how we fundamentally interact and relate to each other. It stands to reason that when we do so in a pleasant and civilised manner we’ll always get better results than we would if we’re hostile, self-serving or small-minded. As stated, much of it is common sense, but I resolutely believe the book still has considerable merit because there’s thirty-seven principles here; some of which may not be immediately obvious or may be overlooked (or may even be avoided because we don’t realise how much impact they could have). Also, although the examples belong to yesteryear, they still clearly expound the principles and show how and why they’re applicable to real-world situations. Regarding that, please note that there’s a modern version of the book available aimed at today's readership entitled How to Win Friends and Influence People in the Digital Age by Dale Carnegie Training. I have it as well, but still prefer the charm and style of the original. Finally, the book is composed of easily-digestible and manageable chunks, and this Kindle edition is nicely formatted. As far as I’m concerned, it’s a book for life that has served me well, that has been well and truly tested and proven to work.

Great book

Very entertaining and informative. Useful in practical life.